Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Kid Incident #4 – Who’s That Crazy Lady In The Blue Striped Robe?

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I have to apologize in advance to my little man, Braden. He seems to be the subject of all of the “incidents” so far. My bad, B. You little stinker.

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I’m sure many of you have experienced a similar point during the day to days with little boys where you can’t keep them out of anything…nor can you keep them IN anywhere either.

Braden was (maybe still is?) at that stage for an unbearable amount of time. You see, God blessed me with with my first son and decided to cut me some slack (he was a bit of a surprise) and give me a fairly calm toddler the first go round.

The second one? Well, he’s like a dozen wild boys rolled into one. Everything that I didn’t experience with Lanham, Braden gave me ten fold.

I never had baby locks on my cabinets. With Braden, everything is locked up.

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Lanham was always cautious about climbing on anything…still is. Braden is a totally monkey boy and could climb on the kitchen table. He once tried to hang from the kitchen table light fixture.

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He also helped me with dishes. What a sweetheart. ;)

Lanham always stayed by my side, happily watching TV on my bed, while I snagged a quick shower. Braden…

Well, that leads me to today’s INCIDENT.

Braden became strong enough to open our sliding glass doors that leads out to the deck. Not a huge deal. We have a fence, but he would go out there rain or shine. He also would let the puppy out at will and she came running back in covered in mud. Irritating, but still…that’s motherhood, I suppose.

Most days I try to shower during his naps or after everyone goes to bed because Braden has proved that he can come up with mischief I could never dream of.

One day, I threw caution to the wind and thought, I stink, I need to shower. I’m showering. P U mama!

I wet my hair, I talk to B, he talks back. I shampoo my hair and just before rinsing, I talk to B…he doesn’t talk back. I just knew I’d regret that shower.

Quick hair rinse and I hop out of the shower, yelling his name for all the world to hear…no answer.

But do I panic?!? Nope, I just take a look out my big bedroom window that over looks our back yard and see my fears become a reality.

Picture this: Half naked toddler (its chilly weather mind you) running across the deck, chasing his 4 month old puppy, round and round. Our deck has two entrances. Fab.

Now picture this: I grab the only robe I have, which is a snazzy, XL blue stripey number that I picked up on clearance right before I gave birth to the now streaking toddler. I race downstairs and out to the deck and begin a very strange version of cat and mouse. Except my version goes puppy (mouse), B-boy (cat) and then myself (gorilla in a blue striped suit).

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Round and round we go, my voice getting nastier by the minute. Did I mention we live in a fairly newish suburban area where anyone can see anything going on within a 6 house radius? Yes, a fine moment. Oh and all the trees are kind of small so noise (mother’s screaming!) carries really really well.

I did finally capture Braden and get him in the house. I called my husband and was at Home Depot within the hour getting one of these.

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My husband was away on business, but I installed the new top of the door dead bolt before we headed to bed that evening. Works like a charm, btw.

Once again Braden, cuteness is your saving grace.

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6 comments:

  1. Oh I love the comment "cuteness is your saving grace." I get that. It is Da Mo's saving grace, too.

    Good job on your installation of said new lock. I would have worried about the same thing, but then it becoming a reality. OMG! Oh and I'm a business trip widow quite often as well. So I'm feelin the whole story.

    ((hugs))

    and I'm sure you didn't look like a big blue gorilla, but it made for a fun mental picture.

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  2. LOL! Good solution to the problem!

    He is awfully cute though.

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  3. Hilarious story and I know it wasn't funny at the time. Isn't it funny how one child is so calm and the next such an explorer? These will be the awesome stories you will tell in his adult years to his future wife :)

    I breezed through two girls, then on the third, bless her heart, I just couldn't get a handle on parenting her. At every twist and turn there was a new "adventure." We had to put an extra lock up high also. I would find her after a mad search and finally a phone call from the neighbor, 3 houses down the street - Pooping - because she liked their bathroom better. To this day she still has that same spirit and that's one of the things we love best about her.

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  4. LOL I can just see that happening! Sorry you had to go through that, especially when your husband was out of town! I know how stressful that can be.

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  5. Hahahaha, I'm laughing because I lived this with my 1st grandson. I never had to childproof anything and now I have a hook and lock on the back slider, (wish I had known of your nifty contraption) doorknob covers on every doorknob, cabinet locks, he is inquisitive to put it mildly. I hope his baby brother doesn't follow in his footsteps.

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  6. There must be something with the second boy and the name Braden. My second son is named Braeden and he is just like your son. I feel your pain.

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